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Health & Fitness

Moderate Earthquake Strikes LA Area

Moderate Earthquake Strikes LA Area:  A magnitude-5.1 earthquake has struck the Los Angeles area, causing gas leaks, water main breaks, and a rock slide near the earthquake epicenter.  City officials are requesting everyone observe a moment of silence for anyone who may have been getting plastic surgery, a tattoo or colon hydrotherapy when the quake struck.

Woman Named Crispi Trys Burning Down Boyfriend’s House With Bacon:  Police say they arrested a Utah woman named Crispi after they caught her attempting to burn her ex-boyfriend's house down with a flaming pile of bacon.  Why that’s just crazy!  I hope she fries for this.

http://www.johnnyrobish.com

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Texas Man Ticketed After Attaching Pic of Penis to Job Application:   A Texas man has been ticketed for "distribution of an obscene display” after he attached a picture of his (or a) penis to his job application.  He didn’t get the job either because - as it turns out- they didn’t have an “opening” for him at the firm.

Air Force Fires Nine Commanders in Cheating Scandal:  The Air Force announced that it was firing nine commanders caught up in a nuclear test proficiency exams cheating scandal in the U.S. nuclear missile program.  What’s to test?  You push the button, everything blows up.  What else is there to know?

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http://www.johnnyrobish.com

Steven Seagal May Emigrate to Russia:  Action star and conservative activist Steven Seagal told the Moscow Times that he greatly favors Putin over Obama, is in favor of Russia’s military action in Crimea and says he may one day emigrate to the former Soviet Union.  Of course the big question remains, if he does emigrate, will Sarah Palin be able to see him from her front porch?

London Subway Construction Crew Finds Ancient Mass Burial:  Construction work has been temporarily halted on the London subway’s new $24 billion high-speed Crossrail line after an excavation crew dug up a mass grave filled with pottery and human rib cages, dating back to 1348.  All I can say is, that seems like one hell of a long time to wait for the subway. 

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